Body Language : The Language you don’t say!

In recent years lots of studies are done to understand the body language. After long time people has realised the importance of this silent language. Knowingly we talk with other what we want to, but unknowingly we are spreading many more massages by our outer physic of the body. Many studies says 55% of our communication is visual, 38% what we say and 7% the words only. Whatever is the percentage but it is clear that every thing is connected with a person. The question here exist is how to read a person correctly? Understanding one in the it is help you to bring a desired outcome. If you unaware of this will lead to muddle the communications and ultimately miss the opportunity of straight talk.

Let us come to the question, what are the main categories of nonverbal communication? Many scholar suggest it is three:

#    PARALANGUAGE    [the vocal part of speech and its nuances]

#    KINESICS                  [the study of the body’s physical movements] 

#    PROXEMICS             [a person’s perception of space]

Here I will talk only one of these categories, KINESICS, also a common person know it by Body Language  It is not that understanding body language will make you wealthy, sexy or any thing else but correctly reading silent signals coming out of a person will make you good communicator and more understanding human being.

Each and everyone is a transmitter and constantly transmitting nonverbal dues. So there is a constant source of information available about us. If you can catch these signals, you’ll be better able to respond them. According to legend, President Roosevelt, a firm believer in nonverbal communication, decided to have some fun one evening. Each person came up and shook hands with him and said, “Good evening, Mr. President, and how are you, sir?” He responded warmly with a pleasant smile and a firm handshake, “I’m fine, thank you, I just murdered my mother-in-law.” Not one person reacted to his comment. It’s doubtful they even hard it. It show’s the response from the listener come according to your body language, as it is unconscious part

Body language transmits feelings, reading it one can understand the wants and feelings of others which is more important than understanding their words. Below is the few example which I come to know after different readings.

• Hands behind head:- Clasping your hands behind your head suggests authority. This gesture is seen frequently in managers and bosses.

• Hand on hips:- Hand on hips with feet spread apart indicates defiance or aggression. It also can be seen by someone making a power play. The movement most readily associated with sincerity and openness is open hands, Straight talkers use this gesture frequently.

• Crossing arms in front of chest: -  People often assume that crossing arms in front of  chest is a defensive gesture. It often is …. But it can have many other meanings. Making a judgment based on a single gesture can be hazardous. Standing with the amts crossed is more comfortable than many other attitudes. It can mean “ I am cold” and that the person is trying to hold in warmth. It can be an attempt to respect another’s personal space. Beware of judging anyone’s movements based on a single gesture. Look for clusters of gestures when reading body language.

• Handshak:- Handshaking is an art. A person who extends only the four finger of the hand to be shaken is often reticent and standoffish. 

Then there is the handshake in which the other person’s hand is on top, palm down, forting you to turn your palm upwards. The person of top has a very dominant handshake; he or she may be out for your job? Or your wife or husband. On the other hand, if the dominant position hand shaker is a woman, it might simply be a feminine gesture left over from the days when a man kissed a woman’s extended hand.

 The handshake in which the shaker envelops both of your hands with both of his of hers is known as the politician’s shake. It is meant to show warmth and friendliness. It can be sincere of convey great insincerity. Only further in depth observation will tell the truth.

Be careful about judging someone based on their flaccid, dead fish handshake. There may be mitigating circumstances. Maybe he has arthritis. Perhaps she is an athlete or very strong person who is concerned about hurting your hand. Musicians, surgeons and artists may e protective of their hands.

As a rule, match the pressure used by the other hand shaker, look into his/her eyes and try to remember their color. This direct eye contact occurring with the handshake communicates an honest desire to meet the person.

A proper handshake can make a person much more willing to listen to you. Learn all the nuances of the powerful straight talk tool.

• Facial expressions:- Facial expressions is very important thing for straight talk. To persuade someone, pay particular attention to his or her eyes.

 Casting a glance upward and rapidly blinking eyelids can mean the person is considering your proposition seriously.

 If he looks you straight in the eye in a pleasant manner without trying to stare you down, then he is most probably interested. If the person refuses to look at you directly or drops her eyes, hence the expression shitty eyed, beware it is possible they will be shifty in their verbal communications as well. Of course, they may be shy or hard of hearing there could be any number of other explanations. Make judgments only after observing 8 number of nonverbal clues that all point in the same direction.

Body language varies greatly from culture to culture. In many cultures direct eye contact is offensive, it is often read as a sign of respect to drop one’s eyes. Take all of this in consideration when making judgments based on nonverbal cues.

When a person is trying to remember something, she will raise her brows, as if trying to see it. When an individual rejects an idea, he will close his eyes. Once the idea is accepted or understood, the head will nod affirmatively and then the eyes will open wave.

• Smile:- Smiling is one of the most universally understood pieces of body language. A smile usually says, “I like you.” A smile can be a wonderful source of communication, or it can be a mask that prevents communication. If someone smiles in response to any and every occasion, that smile is likely a mask that hide true feelings and gives that person a chance to collect her thoughts and gain control. Smile when pleased, not to please. Smiling inappropriately or continuously can result in not being taken seriously.

• Head Tilting:- Head Tilting can be significant. Rotating your head upward can be an attempt to claim superiority. Rotating your head downward suggests submission or “hanging your head in shame.” Tilting your head away during a discussion can indicate disagreement. Tilting your head toward the speaker communicates careful attention and thus agreement.

The above is few body phenomena, there can be many more to know. It can give you an edge in you communications with others. This knowledge will help you to better understand hidden messages. It will add clarity in communications.